


Meeting the Parents

by guessimdemoms



Category: Ben Brainard, Welcome To The Statehouse (Web Series), Welcome To The Table
Genre: Disney, Gen, Homophobic Language, M/M, Meet the Family, Original Character(s), Original Male Character - Freeform, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-03
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-15 03:34:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29182593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/guessimdemoms/pseuds/guessimdemoms
Summary: Florida expected a lot of things about meeting his boyfriend's family; finding out that they're rich-rich wasn't one of them
Relationships: Florida/DC, Florida/Original Male Character
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Back at it again with this AU!  
> Remember George is basically the DC/Gov we've been seeing in the videos. The DC mentioned is a different DC.

“And then, Robert wrestled the gator to the ground, and the street vendors' cabbages were saved!” George choked on his water as he laughed, his boyfriend finishing up another one of his crazy stories. 

“Christ Juan! You need to take me to his zoo one time, the man in a modern-day Steve Irwin.” George laughed putting his cup down. 

“He does a good crawfish boil too, we should go down to Madri Gras together.” Florida suggested poking at his burger. 

“Eh maybe, usually the station does their usual crazy wedding cover over that time so I’d have to see. And you know how Peyton is.” George pointed out. 

“Want me to smack him?” Florida asked. 

“Nah, I’m good but thanks.” George said with a small smile. He poked at the lettuce in his salad before quickly glancing up. “OH I mean to tell you, my parents are coming from Miami this weekend and they’d love to meet you.” 

“Okay but I’ll need to buy some disinfectant.” Florida announced a mouthful of burger spilling as he talked. George tilted his head in confusion as Florida swallowed. 

“Are they coming from The Villages?” Florida explained. 

“OH, no they don’t live there. They are retired though, mom had to fight dad on that.” George said with a snicker. “But I figured we could all go out for dinner or something, don’t worry dad won’t threaten you with a shotgun.” 

“It’s okay it’ll be a shotgun battle!” Florida offered, making his boyfriend laugh. “So what did your parents do?” George’s eyes went wide before he brought his focus back to his salad. 

“Love?” Florida asked, tilting his head. George sighed and looked up at Florida, a sheepish grin on his face. 

“My….my great-great uncle may….have been Walt Disney….” 

“WHAT?” All the states yelled as Florida recounted the story a couple days later. 

“His grandfather was Roy E Disney, he’s part of the Disney family.” Florida muttered flipping through the channels of the TV. 

“Oh. He rich-rich.” Colorado muttered. 

“Why is that boy a news reporter then, surely he must have a trust fund?” Texas asked. 

“Maybe he wants to earn his money, as opposed to relying off the hard work his great-great uncle and grandfather did. Not to mention the exploitation of their workers.” California pointed out. 

“No, nerd is right.” Florida began. 

“HEY.” 

“He didn’t want to be like his sister and live off the family's money, he wanted to earn his keep.” Florida explained. 

“Sha why are you so down? That boy loves you, and his family will love you too.” Louisiana pointed out. 

“But his family is rich! And they’re going to take us out to dinner! Probably at some fancy restaurant where I’ll have to know which fork is which and caviar and all that shit.” Florida whined. 

“They’re not going to care….” 

“Yes they will! I want to be good enough for their son!” Florida cried. The other states fell silent as Florida moped. 

“We….we could help…..” Connecticut began. 

“We CAN?” California yelled. 

“Sure we can! We can train him up so he’ll be passable as a rich society man.” Connecticut pointed out. 

“You want to train him to be a society man? You’d have a better chance than Republicans winning Massachusetts.” California continued. 

“WOOOOOOOOOWWWWW……” Louisiana and Florida said offended.   
“I’m with nutmeg….” 

“Gee thanks.” Connecticut said rolling his eyes. 

“Florida is Florida, we can just change him to be decent overnight.” Utah pointed out. 

“Oh please.” Florida begged, shocking the other states. “I want to prove to his parents that I’m good enough for him.” The states all looked at each other, a silent agreement passing between them. 

“I have a book, hang on.” California said with a sigh leaving the group. 

“Sha we’ll help you, don’t worry.” Louisiana comforted. California came back and handed Florida a small leatherbound book. 

“Here Florida, take my etiquette book. It’ll help you learn how to be….decent.” California explained. 

“Why do you have that?” Texas asked. 

“Probably to be smug.” Alaska muttered making the states around him snicker. 

“What’s going on here?” A cool voice asked, and all the states turned to see DC standing in the doorway between the kitchen and living room with his hands on his hips. 

“Uh…..we’re just…..talkin’ college football!” South Carolina quickly lied. 

“Yeah! You’re going down Texas!” Arkansas added. 

“Whatever.” DC said rolling his eyes. “Meeting in five.” The states watched the federal district walk off before breathing a sigh of relief. 

“Thanks guys.” Florida said with a smile as the states began getting up. “You don’t know how much this means to me.” 

“I still can’t believe we’re helping him.” New York muttered. 

“Oh give it a break, even your cold dead heart should see that the boy’s in deep.” Louisiana pointed out. 

“And we work better when we’re together, not when we’re apart.” 

Florida stared down at the fancy dinner plate arrangement at his spot at the table. 

“The hell is this?” Florida asked. 

“We’re doing a mock fancy dinner to help you practice.” California announced from the kitchen. 

“I can barely understand the lingo let alone practice!” Florida pointed out. 

“Didn’t you read the book?” Utah asked placing a pot on the table. 

“I can’t read.” Florida pointed out, making everyone groan. 

“This was a bad idea.” Connecticut whispered to Louisiana who shoved him. 

“C’mon sha let’s sit down, we can help.” Louisiana offered. All the states sat down, save for California who was still cooking. 

“What’s with all the forks?” Florida asked picking up one of the forks. 

“That’s your salad fork.” Connecticut explained. 

“George doesn’t eat his salads with a fancy fork!” Florida pointed out. 

“For fancy dining you do!” Connecticut yelled, getting increasingly aggravated at the state. 

“The other two are your fish and meat forks, and on the other side is your meat, fish, and salad forks.” Utah continued trying to stop a fight. 

“This is hopeless.” Florida groaned putting his head in his hands. 

“Soups on!” California announced bringing the pot into the dining room. “Literally the first course is soup.” Florida glanced up as California filled his bowl with the soup then gaped. 

“THAT’S IT?” Florida yelled. 

“I’ve seen potholes in Boston that are bigger!” Massachusetts added.   
“This is what sophisticated people eat during twelve course dinners.” California said matter-of-factly. Florida stared at his puddle of soup before grabbing a spoon and going to dig in.

“Hang on buttercup, that’s not the soup spoon.” Texas announced. 

“There’s separate spoons for soup?” Florida gasped. Texas pointed to the large ladle spoon on the end of the knives. Florida groaned and picked up the spoon begrudgingly. The states dove into their supper; Florida was growing increasingly frustrated because at every scrap of his spoon or slurp a state would pipe up “no slurping’ or ‘watch your spoon’. Eventually Florida threw his spoon down in frustration. 

“This is hopeless! I can’t do this!” Florida yelled getting up. He stormed out of the kitchen and back to the living room, slumping on the couch. The states all stared at each other in a loss; Louisiana took the hint and got up, following his friend to the living room.

“Sha…..” 

“I just want them to like me.” Florida whimpered. “I just want them to think I’m right for their son.” 

“They will, they’ll think you’re perfect for him.” Louisiana pointed out. 

“I don’t even have a suit…..” 

“What happened to the one you wore at bunker boys' inauguration?” New York asked peeking out from the kitchen. 

“I dressed an alligator up in it.” Florida sniffled. 

“Why don’t I take you out to get a nice suit? It’ll make you feel all fancy n’ shit.” Louisiana suggested. 

“Can we get Chick Fil A on the way?” Florida asked. Louisiana smiled and side-eyed his friend. 

“Sure ‘sha. Whatever you want.” 

Two days later and Florida was getting ready to meet George’s parents, a pit in his stomach. 

“I look…..stupid….” Florida muttered staring at himself in the mirror. He looked uncharacteristically not-Florida; he wore a nice blue shirt with nice dress shoes and his hair was flat and tamed. The only thing Florida about him was his turquoise flamingo tie, which he had ever since DC made him buy his last suit. 

“You look fine hun.” Maryland pointed out fixing Florida’s suit. 

“I look….like DC.” Florida gagged. 

“Nah you have a heart.” Arkansas snickered. Florida turned around and studied himself all over in the mirror, groaning at how stiff he looks. 

“I can’t do this.” Florida whispered. 

“No you’re doing this, you’re going to meet his parents and charm them, and they’ll be so happy they’ll let you marry that boy.” Louisiana announced putting his hands on Florida’s shoulders. 

“We….we talking marriage now?” Florida asked. 

“I want grandchildren!”

“Just ‘cuss his parents are loaded doesn’t mean they’ll be snobs.” Colorado pointed out, dazed out of his mind. 

“I hope you’re right.” Florida muttered. He took one last look in the mirror before turning back to the other states. 

“Guess I’m off.” Florida announced. 

“Knock ‘em dead sha.” Louisiana said with a smile. Florida took a deep breath before making his way out of the house, into the muggy Florida air. He looked up at the night sky and took in the sounds all around him before making his way to his car, when his cellphone rang. 

“Love?” 

“Hey babes!” George greeted leaning back in one of the newscasters chairs. “I’ll be out at about ten, just wanted to tell you where to meet us.”   
“Is it Alberto’s because I don’t think I’m allowed in there anymore.” Florida said quickly, beginning to panic. 

“Alberto’s? Nah it’s not it’s….” 

“I don’t know if I can do this George, I’m not a fancy guy. I had soup the other night that was as deep as Alaska!” Florida exclaimed. 

“The….state?” 

“Never mind.” Florida said hand-waving his statement away. “But your parents will expect you to date someone of a certain class and I can barely function in a regular restaurant let along a fancy one!” Florida paused to catch his breath, panicking at the silence. Maybe George was realizing he couldn’t possibly date someone as classless as him, maybe he was laughing at him with his parents right now! 

“I wanted to give you directions to the new alligator tail place.” George said slowly. Florida’s heart stopped. 

“W-What?” 

“Dad saw it on the way up and really wants to try it. He’s still sad that one place on I95 got shut down.” George explained. 

“We’re….we’re not going fancy?” Florida whispered. 

“Nah, Juan, my parents hate those kinds of places. They had their anniversary dinner at Victoria and Albert’s and then went to Wendy’s after. They’re not that stuff.” George continued. Florida sniffled and wiped his eyes. 

“I’m an idiot.” Florida chuckled. 

“You’re my idiot.” George said with a smile. “Just hurry up, I’m hungry. Love you.” 

“Love you too.” Florida hung up and breathed a sigh of relief before looking back down at his body. 

“I need to change!” Florida announced before hurrying to his car to the change of clothes he knew was in the backseat.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jenny is basically IDC but instead of being just a mean girl....she still is but more overprotective of her younger brother.

Florida arrived at the restaurant in no time at all, dressed in his usual attire save for the flamingo tie that he refused to take off. 

“JUAN!” George called waving the state over to his booth. Florida tried to take deep breaths as he noticed George’s parents, and his sister, lock eyes with him as he approached the booth. The reporter pretended not to notice, however, and jumped up to kiss his boyfriend. 

“Mom, dad this is Juan.” George announced as his mom and dad got up. 

“Juan it’s nice to meet you! I’m Benjamin Thomas, and my wife Abigail.” Mr. Thomas announced shaking the state's hand. 

“It’s so nice to meet the boy my son has been enchanted by.” Mrs. Thomas said with a wide smile. Florida heard a scoff coming from the table, probably from the sister. 

“Oh and this is my daughter Jenny, she’s excited to meet you too.” Mrs. Thomas quickly deflected. Jenny briefly looked up from her phone to greet the state then immediately rolled her eyes and went back to texting. All five squeezed into the booth, Florida not feeling as anxious with George holding his hand. 

“So what do you do for work?” Mr. Thomas asked. 

“Oh! I own my own club.” Florida announced proudly. He knew California really wanted him to change his cover story, but it was the only one that was truly ‘him’. 

“It’s down in Miami, he says it gets a lot of traffic during the summer.” George said proudly. 

“What club in Miami?” Jenny asked, finally speaking up. Florida cringed, it was like the girl was seeing through his lies. 

“Oh it’s uh….Club…..Club Hispania.” Florida said quickly. Jenny tilted her head and smiled in a mocking way. 

“I’ve been to plenty of clubs in Miami and I’ve never heard of Club Hispania.” Jenny announced. Florida inwardly panicked but was saved by Mrs. Thomas who scolded her daughter. 

“Maybe you passed it on the boardwalk and didn’t notice it.” Florida breathed a sigh of relief, George squeezed his hand.   
“We heard how you saved George from that alligator, that was some quick thinking.” Mr. Thomas offered. 

“Thanks, I've grown up around alligators all my life.” Florida said with a smile, trying to ignore the eye roll from Jenny. 

“Florida’s family lived in Daytona, he says alligators were like his pets.” George added. 

“They still kind of are! Me and Loui always trade alligator videos back and forth when DC’s having his dumb meetings. DC gets so mad! California pretends he doesn’t like it but I see him looking.” Florida explained. 

“I’m….sorry, DC? California? What are you talking about?” Jenny asked. 

“Oh….uh….they’re….codenames! Codenames for my friends.” Florida quickly lied. Jenny turned to her parents completely flabbergasted. 

“Why are you humoring this?” Jenny asked. 

“Jenny be nice.” Mrs. Thomas ordered. 

“This backwoods swamp man is probably after George’s money!” Jenny pointed out. 

“Hey I make my own money!” Florida argued. 

“Guys can we please not--” George begged. 

“You remember that last man you dated, he tried to sneak stock prices out of you!” Jenny argued. 

“Juan is a good man Jenny.” Mr. Thomas pointed out. 

“Please can we not--” 

“Yeah and I don’t even UNDERSTAND the stock market!” Florida yelled. 

“Neither did Michael and he still tried!” Jenny pointed out. 

“George dear, breath.” Mrs. Thomas begged, turning Florida’s attention back to his boyfriend. George had gone very red and was gripping the table so hard his knuckles turned white, trying to regulate his breath. 

“George?” Florida whispered. George didn’t respond of course, which prompted Florida to gently take his arm and take him out of the booth to the outside of the restaurant. 

“Breath love, please breath.” Florida whispered, rubbing George’s arm. 

“I’m s-s-sorry….I’m s-s-so sorry….” George panted. 

“It’s alright, I understand I’ve got a sibling too. They’re bad.” Florida joked, making George laugh. His breathing finally regulated itself and he gazed at his boyfriend. 

“Thanks babes, I-I’m sorry about Jenny. S-she’s just overprotective….I’ve had some bad relationships.” George explained. 

“Hey don’t worry about it, I was in an on again off again relationship with Mother Nature for a few years.” Florida said with a shrug. 

“Mother Nature--” 

“Don’t worry about it.” George smiled and kissed Florida on the cheek. “Wanna go back and try again?” 

“Hell yeah I didn’t even get my alligator tail!” Florida pointed out. George laughed before taking his boyfriend’s hand and leading him back into the restaurant. 

Later that night, outside the States House, George and Florida kissed softly under the full moon. The rest of dinner went soundly; Mr. Thomas was enthralled by Florida’s stories of chaos and while Mrs. Thomas disapproved of some of his adventures; she still found him charming and full of spirit. Jenny didn’t talk much the rest of the evening, she spent most of it picking at her food and glaring at the state. But Florida didn’t care because it was clear that he was in the parents good graces, and their approval meant everything. 

George leaned back slightly sending Florida to miss his lips and fall on his chest. The two dissolved into giggles, too love drunk to even correct their mistake. 

“I’m so glad I didn’t let that alligator eat you.” Florida whispered. 

“Yeah, then Logan may have had to hire someone new, the cheapass.” George said with a snicker. He ran his hands through Florida’s hair as the state gazed up at him.   
“Stay with me? Tonight?” Florida whimpered. 

“Didn’t you say Adam is having a meeting tomorrow? Won’t he know, I know he’s strict.” George pointed out. 

“Not until the afternoon, you’ll be long gone at work by then. Please?” Florida begged. George grinned and kissed Florida’s cheek. 

“You still got my change of clothes from last time in your trunk?” George asked. Florida grinned a manic grin. 

“Oh I always do.” 

“I wonder how Florida’s date last night went.” Utah muttered at the sink the next morning. 

“I didn’t hear him come in, do you think he spent the night at George’s?” Ohio asked. 

“Christ, I’m getting more accepting of the queering but shouldn’t they at least wait until marriage?” Texas groaned. 

“Stop CALLING it that!” California hissed. 

“If we didn’t hear Florida come in, it must mean he had a good date.” Louisiana said proudly. 

“I did!” Florida announced making the other states jump. 

“So you did come home last night!” Utah said, surprised. 

“Course I did! Get this.” Florida announced pulling up a stool. “His parents may be loaded but they’re down to Earth! His sister’s a bitch though.” 

“That’s no way to speak about a woman!” Texas said, clutching his chest. 

“If you met her you’d know.” 

“Sha we fully expected you to spend the night over his house.” Louisiana pointed out. 

“Mmmm ‘bout that…” Florida said sheepishly as someone shuffled into the kitchen.

“Is the coffee on?” George mumbled, still half asleep. The states couldn’t have been more amused by his appearance; his boxers were covered by one of Florida’s shirts and he had Florida’s bucket hat on his head. 

“Dear God….” Texas muttered before Florida stepped on his foot. 

“Fresh pot on the stove.” Utah announced thoroughly amused. 

“Great.” George mumbled shuffling to the stove, but not before pausing and pecking Florida on the cheek. 

“I can see it now.” Louisiana sighed happily, watching the show. “My grandkids are going to call me papi…..”


End file.
